What you sow is what you reap! This is also very true when it comes to personal relationship. If you don’t sow anything, all you get is weed and unwanted issues. If you sow low maintenance plants, you get cacti but if you sow and maintain you can get beautiful magnolias and roses. Same applies to relationships, you have to put in time and also work towards maintenance. Unfortunately, we don’t have time to do so because of the busy shifts jobs and surviving in a country where jobs are getting cut each day. Our only goal becomes earning money, picking up as many shifts and paying off the mortgage. In this cycle, we forget the most important thing in our life: Love and relationship.
Ask yourself this simple question: is love really important? Is your answer is no, please don’t read further. But if you want to make time for love and want to work on your relationship out of your busy schedule, follow me and read on.
1. Spend quality time: It’s not that we all work 24×7. We do have day offs and evenings where we can have a heart to heart conversation about things. Find time every day to ask your partner how was his/her day. Go out for evening walks and discuss about things that bother you. Just find time to discuss and talk!
2. Appreciate…everyday:We tend to appreciate and compliment eachother during the initial phase of relationship but with time this dilates and we take things for granted. Humans, in general, crave for compliments and appreciation. So make sure that you compliment your partner every day, it may be for their clothes, hair, food they coked, their organizational skills. Compliments are a necessary reminder for your partner that you are still attracted towards him/her physically as well as emotionally. Doing it every day will make your partner warmer towards you.
3. Have common goals: Discuss about your common goals and work on it together. It might be regarding investment, buying a new property, family planning or it might be as simple as purchasing a new coach. Plan it together and work on all the common goals. Having common goals strengthens your relationship and builds a strong bond
4. Ask for advice:People need to feel needed. Asking for advice is a great way to show your partner that you respect and depend on them in a healthy way. It may be for an issue with a friend, family or at work.
5. Give kisses and hugs:Touching, hugging and kissing are very pertinent for a healthy relationship. Only sex is not important for a good physical relationship. Holding hands and hugging each other make a couple closer to each other. Make sure you hug and kiss your partner every day.
6. Surprise each other: It’s very easy to fall in the monotony of routine life. But small things like: booking a surprise dinner reservation, cooking his/her favorite meal, baking a cake, getting small gifts and flowers when he/she least expect it will surely help in surprising your partner, and will help you bring the spice back in your life.
7. Don’t hold grudges: Couples fight. Often! But then learn to move on. Don’t discuss previous flights again and again. This leads to a cycle which only irritates the other person and might lead to one person shutting down towards the other. When you have resolved a flight, don’t let it appear again. Move on and don’t hold grudges.
8. Help each other:In a relationship both partners have designated chores, but won’t you feel nice when he has made the bed tea, and she has fixed the light bulb. It might not be the same things, but you get the point right? Being considerate for each other is a key for a happy relationship.
9. Plan things together: Even if it is the much awaited Europe trip, a dinner date, or a place for quick breakfast. Make sure that both of you are active participants in the planning, and make sure that you plan something frequently. Remember, your relationship is just not confined to the mundane four walls, go out and enjoy!
10. Be the one to apologize first: Ask yourself, do you want to fight and keep arguing or do you want to forgive and move on? Arguments can never endin a relationship, and often these arguments are over petty issues. Don’t let such petty things consume your time where you could have enjoyed together. Apologizing is not very easy as it sounds, but it just makes you a bigger person.
Applying these 10 mantras (and genuinely meaning it) in the limited time that you got, will definitely help you to have a happily ever after.